You Think You’re So Clever

I can’t fully express the level of disgust that I feel for people that have no respect for the staff of a restaurant. What is broken in their brains that would make them think they are better and smarter than someone working in the food service industry simply because they themselves do not work in the food service industry? I got to watch this thought process in action for much longer than I would like to admit and these are my observations.

Subject: The angry, bitter mother of an angry, bitter girl with whom I once associated on a regular basis.

The place: A moderately nice restaurant at which said bitter girl was employed.

The scheme: Give intentionally confusing instructions regarding the food in the hopes that they screw something up so she can complain and try to get a free meal or more. Complain regardless of whether or not anything is screwed up and leave no tip.

The result: Animosity and pity.Table in Restaurant

Let me be clear. This is in no way a joke. This is something that actually happened in my presence and was explained to me by the subject. I witnessed her doing this multiple times with everything from burgers at fast food joints to over the phone orders for restaurant delivery. She loved to complain in the hopes that they would give her free things rather than deal with her complaining.

How stupid does she think people are? Every time I watched this happen I could see her devious little smirk creep onto her face. She thought she was so clever. I could see it. The wait staff could see it. The only person who didn’t know how obvious she was is the subject. Waiters and restaurant delivery people are not stupid. They aren’t simpletons who couldn’t get another job. They are people and they don’t deserve to be treated like this.

That incident in the restaurant was the one and only time that I was forced into being a part of this stupidity. I could see the waiter cocking a questioning and doubting eyebrow as the subject complained. The waiter then looked at me with a glance that said “is this a joke?” and I just shook my head. She left no tip and I doubled mine. She shouldn’t go back to that restaurant or order any restaurant delivery from someplace where she’s tried this. Waiters remember trouble customers.


  • Annie

    January 13, 2013

    This story reminds me of a former friend of mine.

    We were driving from Miami to Dallas. Actually, I was driving, because it was dark and raining and she did not drive in the dark or the rain, and besides, carsickness! Doom!. She had finally fallen asleep near Orlando, and I did not stop AT ALL until I found a truck stop just west of New Orleans.

    It was late, and there was only one waitress. The kitchen had closed, but the cook offered to heat up cream of potato soup and make grilled cheese sandwiches.

    I thought that was wonderful.

    And then she started.

    No fries?

    What about aburger?

    Could she have ham?

    How about tomato grilled into the grilled cheese?

    Be sure and put mayo on the grilled cheese!

    Etc., etc., etc.

    She would demand something. I wouldapologize. You’ve seen it happen.

    The food comes.

    I inhale mine, because obviously the waitress is cleaning and trying to get out.

    She nibbles and pokes athers.

    The waitress comes over to see if everything is okay (and to take my dishes).

    My friend goes off — the soup is cold! There is only a sliver of tomato on the sandwich! There is too much mayo! The soup is turned and rotten! They are trying to poison us!

    The waitress looks at me.

    She looks very pointedly at my bowl.

    I tell the friend I thought it was okay.

    The cook comes out.

    She raves at him.

    Everyone again looks pointedly at my dishes.

    She tells me that maybe mine was okay, but I should try hers.

    Waitress and cook stare at me.

    She pushes her food over at me and waits.

    I took a bite. Rather than wait for me to agree or disagree, she went into riot mode. So I inhaled her soup and sandwich.

    As soon as I was done, the waitress interrupted her to observe it couldn’t have been that bad, and waved the empty bowl at her.

    I paid the check and tipped both the waitress and cook, and dragged my friend out of there.

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    July 21, 2014

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