I’ll Take Vomit With My Eggs, Please.

This one morning, I had an older gentleman walk into the restaurant I
work at, and proceed to scream at me to sit him and his son at a
booth. Clearly, he woke up on the wrong side of the bed, because it
was around 8:00 a.m. and I’m fairly certain that we barely had any
tables filled. While the man’s son was nice, his father proved to be
quite opposite. When he ordered an item that wasn’t on the menu, and
I told him that we didn’t serve that, he stood up and yelled at me,
“How hard is it too seriously do your job? You can be a retarded and
still wait tables, so walk over to your manager, have her make my
food, and get someone that is capable of doing YOUR job to serve
me.” So needless to say after gritting my teeth, biting my tongue,
and cussing him out in the stock room, I walked back over to him,
calmly explained that we do not have his corned beef hash, and asked
him to order something else. He refused to eat, but his son ordered
three massive breakfast meals all for himself. Now, I noticed that his
eyes were a little red, and he was basically lying on the table, but I
didn’t question it, and merely brought out his food. After devouring
everything, the son left a nice tip on the table, and caught me up
with me at the cash register to apologize for his father’s behavior.
Unfortunately, the father heard this, ran back to the table and
grabbed my tip, and said I didn’t deserve this because I was
incapable of taking a F****** order. But despite my anger, God must
have been on my side that morning, because as soon as the father and
his son walked outside, the son puked all over his dad, and passed out
in the parking lot. My last image was of the dad screaming at his son
for drinking and smoking weed while he was covered from head to toe in
vomit…breakfast style. MMMMMMH!

– Stephanie


  • Tom Storff

    June 5, 2010

    Steph, that is a kick ass story. God was def smiling on you that day.

  • Laura

    January 16, 2011

    I wouldnt have let him take the tip. Regardless of the fact that it came from his son, the money didnt come from his pocket, so it’s stealing.

  • yudelnoodle

    June 10, 2012


Leave A Response

* Denotes Required Field