I am serving a very nice family of four. They are very needy, but very polite and respectful the entire time, thus leading me to believe that I would be getting a good tip. They ran me around with stupid requests that fucked up all my timing. “Can we have some more bread?” “Of course, be right back.” I return with the bread. “Oh, thank you. Can we have some extra butter too?” ”No problem.” I return with the butter. “Can we have a side of ranch?” You get the idea. God forbid they ask for everything at the same time. Pain in the ass but it is part of the job. So after it was all said and done they had racked up a nice 100 dollar check and I was having visions of 20%. I run the card for the father and drop the check book off on the table. I watch from afar as he signs the bill and the family gets up to leave. As they are walking by the man stops to shake my hand and says, “Thanks for the great service. You are a really good server.” He pats me on the back and feel waves of cheapness shoot through my body. Fuck, the dreaded VERBAL TIP. I rush over to the table and grab the check book. I fling it open and am devastated to find that my server instincts were right yet again. 6 dollars on a 100 dollar check. Thanks for coming in folks, maybe when my rent is due I will shake my land lord’s hand and say, “thanks for the great apartment.”
- Jim
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That last bit cracked me up!