I approach my party of two ladies. I introduce myself and ask if they have any questions about the menu. “Hmm, I don’t know,” says one lady, “everything just looks so good. I am starving!” I recommend a couple dishes and go grab their drinks. I return to the table fairly certain that the ladies are going to order some of the dishes that I suggested, which should make for a nice little check. I set down the drinks and one of the ladies looks inquisitively at me and says, “how is your ranch dressing?” The wind in my sails instantly vanishes. “Well it is a pretty standard ranch dressing, nothing too special.” “Mmm that sounds really good, I will have the soup and salad.” Fuck. I turn, defeated, to the other lady at the table and wince as she says, “I will have the same thing.” God why are you going out to dinner? As I turn to walk away, thinking that it couldn’t get any worse, I hear an awful sound. “Can we get some bread?”
- Blair
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The only thing worse is when people ask how your water is!
I had one guy ask what COLOR our water was. He was trying to be funny but I wasn’t aware at the time. I said “clear” and he goes “I like my water brown. HAHAHA I’ll have iced tea.”
When his wife couldn’t decide between corn or potatoes he winked at her and said, “You can have MY corn on the cob later” in a suggestive tone. RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME!
He then told my manager (in a clearly joking manner) that I sucked and they wanted the bill free.
Surprisingly he tipped about 30%. Putting up with his bad jokes was worth it, though, since I was able to roll with it.